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Thursday, August 3rd, 2000
9:11 pm - Nothing Ever Changes (Lexie and Fans)
Cutting through the darkest night are my two headlights
Try to keep it clear, but I'm losing it here
To the twilight
There's a dead end to my left
There's a burning bush to my right
You aren't in sight
You aren't in sight

Faith looked at the closed bathroom door, deciding if waiting for Lexie was the best idea. She'd heard that they had open mike night upstairs at the Top of The Mark restaurant and after a couple of phone calls was going to take her guitar up and do a song or two. But taking Lexie had only just recently occurred to her and she wasn't certain it was what she wanted to do. Everything about her life before her cousins fame was precious, the dreams she still held onto somewhere in a part of her heart where that young girl lived, a girl no one ever saw, but she knew was there.

On this hot summer night
Between fight and fight
Is the blind man's sight
And a choice that's right
I roll the window down
Feel like I'm gonna drown in this strange town
Feel broken down
Feel broken down

No one in her family had known, not really, except Lexie and no one had heard her crying when it became painfully clear that no one wanted her then, they wanted her to sing her cousins songs and be like them�No one had known how depressed she had become, not even Lexie, or how many times she wanted to die as it felt her dreams had.

Am I standing still
Beneath a darkened sky
Or am I standing still
Out of the corner of my eye
Was that you passing me by

~Now here I am, waiting to play again. Standing still or moving forward? Funny how it feels the same.~

"Lex! Hurry up, I need to change too." She yelled and looked at the phone, picking it up and dialing quickly. The concierge assured her that all the girls had been notified of the night's rules. That while they were free to leave the hotel, they had to check in before going and leave information about where they would be and then check back in when they returned, and that was not to be after midnight. All the girls that is except Miss Elisa Garcia in room 1703, who had lost her nightly privileges due to her escapades in the pool.
Faith instructed him to arrange for follow up calls to the rooms to verify understanding of the rules within the next 15 minutes and then hung up the phone, looking again toward the bathroom door.
"Lex, if ya don't come out I'm coming in to get ya." She called with a smile, while her fingers whispered idly over her ever-present guitar.

**I'm not gonna write the phone calls to the rooms, so I wrote here what the fans will be told, so everyone can go from there. **

current mood: nervous

(lend your voices)

1:05 pm - it's a dirty job...(Cal, Elisa, Lexie)
People living their lives for you on TV
They say they're better than you and you agree
He says hold my calls from behind those cold brick walls
Says come here boy, there ain't nothing for free
Another doctor's bill, a lawyer bill, another cute cheap thrill
You know you love him if you put him in your will, but ...
Who will save your soul when it comes to the powers now

Faith sighed and hung up the phone, lyrics running through her head, as they always did, making her soundtrack to the life she was now living..
One of the staff members had noticed a few of the fans hanging out at the pool with a blonde boy, causing enough of a scene that some of the older patrons had commented on it.
~Where the hell are you Lex? A little help would be nice�~
Grabbing the key card and shoving it in the back pocket of her jeans, Faith walked out of the room after scribbling a quick angry note to her sister, the oversize shirt she had been wearing over her white tank top when she arrived left discarded on the chair, the heat from the day making her decision for her.

We try to hustle them, try to bust them, try to cuss them
The cops want someone to bust down on Orleans Avenue
Another day, another dollar, another war, another tower
Went up to where the homeless had their homes
So we pray to as many different gods are there are flowers
But we call religion our friend
We're so worried about saving our souls
Afraid that God will take His toll that we forget to begin but
Who will save your soul when it comes to the flowers now

~Caleb. I know it's you down there Caleb Hanson and you know better. I hate being the police around here. We talked about this�I shoulda known I couldn't trust him. Ever since we were little Caleb's been all slick words no follow through. Aunt Diana and Uncle Walker are gonna love this.~

Who will save your soul after all of those the lies that you told, boy

Walking through the lobby and into the pool area, it's skylights letting in the warm sun, Faith closed her eyes and lifted her face to it's warmth, then pulled the glasses off her head down over her eyes. It wasn't hard to find them, in the water, the girl looked like the young lady from Brazil who had only just arrived. ~Already�These girls are supposed to be after the band, not the rest of the guys on the tour. She's not even�Oh man, I knew this was a bad idea when Uncle Walker asked me to help out. ~
Rolling her eyes and clearing her throat Faith stopped by the edge of the pool. "Hey there cuz�" she drawled, the New Orleans accent she usually downplayed heavy in her voice. "Nothin ever changes, huh, Cal? Good to know I can trust ya'."

There are addictions to feed and there are mouths to pay
So you bargain with the Devil, that you're o.k. for today
You say that you love them, take their money and run
Say, it's been swell, sweetheart, but it was just one of those things
Those flings, those strings you've got to cut
So get out on the streets, girls, and bust your butts

Smiling she bent down by the water, hands on the torn out knees of her faded jeans, long blonde hair shimmering in the sunlight, looking more like a rock and roll groupie than the one about to break up the party, her soft voice firm in it's quiet authority.
"You must be Elisa. I'm Faith and if you'd like to stay on the tour, I'd suggest getting off Mr. I'm Hanson's Cousin and heading back to your room." She paused. "Now."
Faith waited for Elisa to leave, her eyes hard as she stared at her cousin.

Who will save your soul if you won't save your own?

current mood: working

(lend your voices)

12:11 pm - Bare Arms, Delinquents, Wayfarer's, and Guitars (Fans,Lexie)
It's leavin time again
I'm headed out with all my friends
It's a roll of the dice
I've never thought twice
About the way I've been spending my time
Trying my guts out for every dime

Strands of long blond hair blew against her cheek, a gentle California wind, making the hot noon sun a little less harsh after the air-conditioned bus. Her bare arms ached to be free from the over-sized denim shirt she had thrown on over the white tank top she wore, just before grabbing her guitar and duffel bag and throwing each over a separate shoulder and stepping off the bus.
At least one of the girls was already in the hotel and chasing them all down like bunch of little children was starting to seem like an exercise in futility. The part of Faith that still wasn't completely sure she didn't hate all three of her cousins for being wellsomething she had wanted and expected to be, was encouraging her to go straight up to her room and let them all fend for themselves, including finding passage to the shows and everything else some of them seemed so anxious to be able to do. ~Then when another one decides to steal something, the hotel can call Rick Tyler and he can deal with the little delinquents.~
Shaking her head, Faith sighed and pulled the pair of Wayfarer's she'd had since first hearing Don Henley sing about them in Boys of Summer out of her pocket. Slipping them over her Hanson blue eyes, she looked toward the sun momentarily. Hearing Henley's voice and the words of the song in her head, as she often did, Faith closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, feeling the summer all around her before walking toward the hotel.
Lexie was still on the bus with the others and she wanted to make sure the desk knew to let her know immediately if any of the keys were not picked up by one of the fans.
Pushing through the doors into the opulent lobby, Faith looked down at her tattered cowboy boots and faded blue jeans then up at the disapproving eyes of the many well-dressed and perfectly groomed older patrons. Their business suits pressed and creased, each pin stripe an example of straightness. Smiling at them, she kept walking, thinking how thankful she was to not be one of them. ~I'd starve playing coffeehouses and back door bars, before I'd turn myself into one of them.~

Working in an office building tall
Don't know who's next to you at all
But being out here
The blood, the guts, the beer
Is a test
Only time will tell
It brings you close, man
Closer than hell

Stopping at the desk, she looked around again, then smiled at the manager who was more than accommodating to one Miss Faith Hanson and couldn't say enough good things about her cousins. Taking one of the keys to room 1700, Faith gave the desk her instructions and made sure a call was made to each girl's room within the next hour to be certain they all knew not to leave the hotel until a group head count had been done, turning then she walked past the fountain to the first wall of elevators, allowing the bellhop to carry her bag, but keep the guitar slung securely across her back.

We're leaving, leaving again
Can't recall where all we been
I guess we'll just go
Go till we're too old
Or we run out of road

current mood: thoughtful

(lend your voices)

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